You don't love me
by lillyredbird
Summary: 6 months this had been happening, and Hiccup saw Tooth every other day.


The days changed every week, but the time was always the same. Three sound knocks on his front door would signal that Hiccup had a guest, though he knew who it was standing outside, waiting to be let in again. 

Every time Hic would spend five minutes convincing himself that he wouldn't answer the door, because the person standing on the other side was just using him and didn't really feel the things he said he did. Though, he would always pull himself up from wherever he was, walk over to the door, let out a deep sigh before answering and let his secret lover in. 

He says secret because Jack, his chemistry partner and the college football captain was so far in the closet, that after he had sex with Hiccup he would go back to his girlfriend's place and sleep with her. Hiccup felt sorry for Tooth, she was a good friend. She always greeted Hiccup with a smile and told him how happy she was that they were friends.

She deserved a better friend then Him, and a better boyfriend then Jack. Hiccup couldn't remember what had happened first, his feelings for Jack or the white haired beauty cornering him one afternoon after chemistry and kissing him so thoroughly that it left him breathless. Though the familiar feeling of bile turning in his stomach at the memory that Jack had been the one to start all of this was enough for him to know that he knew it was wrong, even then.

6 months this had been happening, and Hiccup saw Tooth every other day.

At first he felt guilty. He was going to tell her. He's sure he was… but then Jack would wink at him while everyone was looking away and the words would die in his throat. The moment he knew he had to end it was when he felt jealous that Jack was kissing Tooth in front of him. Thoughts like "that should be me" and "She's not good enough for him" crossed his mind, and before he could even think anything else he realised how wrong he was. Tooth was Jacks girlfriend. She had every right to kiss Jack as much as she wanted in front of whoever she wanted. It wasn't her who wasn't good enough.

So when Hiccup heard the same sound knocks on his door tonight he answered right away, surprising Jack. The pale beauty quickly composed himself and purred out "Hello lover" seductively as he always did when Hiccup answered the door, though Jack lost all his nerve when Hiccup didn't move from his spot in the doorway blocking the entrance to his apartment. "What is it?"

"This needs to stop. It is stopping, right now." Hic said trying to keep his own nerves under wraps. Jack just sighed and looked down at his shoes. 

"Can I at least come in and talk to you about it?" Hiccups first mistake was saying yes.

Once Jack had stepped through the door he kept himself as far away from Hiccup as possible, in an attempt to respect the others wishes to end whatever it was that they had going on, and Hiccup was more than thankful.

"Why?" it had come out broken and Hiccup tried not to flinch. While Jack was in the closet to just about everyone, he had confessed his feelings for Hiccup more than once, and Hic would have believed him had he not done it every time he had even remotely looked like he was going to end it.

"Because, no matter how many times you tell me you love me, you don't. I'm your experiment and I'm done." Jack looked genially hurt at Hiccups words.

"I do love you. I just don-"

"I don't want to hear it Jack!" Hiccup cut him off. He knew the moment his voice started to raise in volume he had lost all control over his emotions. "I don't want to hear about your conflicted feelings!" Hiccup said angrily. "I don't want to hear you tell me how much you love me and her! I can't hear it again! And I won't!" Jack flinched as Hiccups voice got louder.

"But-"

"She deserves better than you." He said quietly, the words even sounded bitter to his own ears. But Hiccup couldn't hold back any more and that was his second mistake.

"I can't watch the two of you be happy together. It eats me up to see you fawning all over her. Do you even realise how much it hurts to watch you kiss her in front of all our friends the way you kiss me behind my locked door?" he said bitterly, but the words sunk themselves deeply into Jacks chest. "Do you know what my feelings for you are? Do you even care? Of course you don't! I'm just your toy, and I can't believe I fell for your games."

"Of course I care!" Jack shouted.

"No you don't! I know you don't!" Hiccup shouted back.

"Anger had started to fill Jack and instead of baking down he held his ground. "How do you know then? Tell me how you know that I don't love you!"

"BECAUSE!" Hiccup screamed, not even caring that his neighbours could hear their fight. "I know because I love you!" tears fell form Hiccups eyes after he said that, but that didn't stop him from confessing more. "I love you with every fibre of my being, and I know that you don't love me the way I love you. I want to be your one and only everything…and you want both me and her...I can't do that anymore Jack…It hurts…" He gripped the front of his shirt tightly, because he could feel the pain, it was sitting there just under his skin.

"Hiccup sunk to his knees.

"I love you Jack…and you don't love me."

"Hiccup couldn't really remember much of what happened after that it was like the world had kept moving while Hiccup had stopped, trapped in a moment in time. Though… He would never forget the sex. And he would never forget how he felt after it.

"Hiccup tried to ignore the tightening feeling in his chest as he felt the mattress dip, signalling that someone was getting out of bed. He didn't know why, but he had really thought the other would stay this time. He bit the inside of his cheek to make sure he didn't make any sounds as he heard the other quietly picking up his cloths and get dressed. Hiccup knew it was a stupid thing to hope for, but he had confessed everything he had ever felt for the other only an hour before. And it had hurt to see that in the end he was right.

He waited for the sound of the front door to shut before he let out a quiet sob. Swearing that the next time his white haired love turned up on his door step he would turn him away, though Hiccup swore that every time he left.


End file.
